twitter: hyp_e
[Know thyself\raised @671\ENFP\CALstudent\FILM destined]

Name's HYP, or Chelsea.
I am a "people pleaser".

I like getting to know people.
I like deep conversations.
I like hypocrisy.
I like being human.

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I'm easy to please, but please, I'm not easy.
I try to be the most genuine person I can be.
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Am I wasting my time trying to figure out where you’re coming from.
I’ve built these stories of everyone else but for you I can’t even comprehend where this story will begin or end.
I’ve built forests and castles for everyone else, but for you I’ve tried to build something greater, 
but all I could manage is this cracked terrarium that no one would ever want for themselves.
I wish you could give me more clues of how to build you,
but the more I dig,
the deeper you fall,
and you tell me that this is not my hole to craw in
and you push me away
and I can’t understand looking from the outside in.

I’ll never understand but I’m trying so hard to crawl myself in,
to claw myself to the closest proximity I can get before the sun burns off my wings. It doesn’t make sense why I’m trying so hard for someone who will never try back.
Is it the myth that the hardest rocks are the greatest diamonds?
Am I putting you on this pedestal for no damn reason but my own.
Is this self-torture? 
Am I lying to myself that I’m doing this because I want to know you in 360 but maybe I’m just not willing to admit defeat in a losing game. Maybe I’m hoping you’ll come to your senses and fall in love with my effort. Cause we’ve been taught that actions speak louder than words. Maybe I’m trying to love you for the both of us. Cause I know if I ever break into your terrarium that it might just be worth it. You might just be worth it. 

When you attract a partner at your lowest point, you are attracting a partner who findsyour low-point desirable. This is not ideal.
— Michele O’Mara, PhD (via infjperspective)

http://thoughtcatalog.com/gabrielle-moss/2013/04/the-key-to-success-is-learning-how-to-get-yelled-at/

I am a person of inherent worth. I don’t need to prove anything to anyone. Tune in the good, tune out the bad. 

This summer was full of social experiments and soul searching. This weekend I wanted to experience the life of a traveling artist and stole 1k watts speakers and a generator to set up near by San Mateo’s version of comic con. Before I even got to set up my equipment I got kicked out lol. So my friend and I decided to just go to Dolores Park with our “need $$$ 4 college” sign. We got no money but we got a lot of smiles, which are kind of the same thing, right? Music and people amaze me everyday. I love SF and the bay so much, how incredible it is for a place to give people so much freedom to be themselves. (at San Francisco, California)

Thank you for teaching me so much about myself. 

I’m happy when I’m making people happy.

But I have to remember that I’m not obliged to focus so much energy on people. Sometimes it’s good to focus on yourself.

jophish:

hmm, this is a stellated rhombic triacontahedron if i remember right, yeah? vertex figure of V[5.3.5.3], dual is icosadodecahedron with 5.3.5.3. the cool thing about icosahdodecahedrons is you know those wireframe ball things that shrink really compact and then you can pull them out really big? those are icosadodecahedrons basically on the surface of a sphere. cool shit.
christ, why do i like geometry so much?
mmmlib:

In close embrace. There are many ways a platonic solid fits elegantly inside another platonic solid, both duals and non-duals. And you can make them all pump! 
I miss this more than I should. 
The most important thing to remember about Idealists is this: one and all, they are incurable romantics.
— David Keirsey, Please Understand Me II (via myersandbriggs)